Week 6: Soft Skills, Solid Ground

By Madalaina Hlava

Why emotional intelligence isn’t extra. It’s essential.

People love to talk about technical skills.

Certifications. Degrees. Experience.
And yes, those matter. They open doors, help land jobs, and get your foot in the room.
But the longer I’ve worked in this field, the more I’ve learned that what keeps you in the room, what earns you real respect, isn’t always what’s listed on your resume.

It’s how you communicate.
How you manage conflict.
How you stay calm when things get messy.
It’s the soft skills. The ones that aren’t always taught but make the biggest impact.

What They Don’t Teach You in Training

They’ll teach you the software.
The standards.
The systems and specs.
But they won’t teach you what to say when someone questions your leadership in front of a room.
They won’t tell you how to redirect a conversation that’s gone off course or worse, gone personal.

You won’t find a chapter on how to correct someone twice your age without making them defensive.
Or how to be assertive without being labeled aggressive.
You won’t be handed a checklist for how to respond when your input is ignored until someone else repeats it five minutes later.

These are the things you figure out on your own.
You learn how to navigate rooms you weren’t expected to lead.
You learn how to earn respect without raising your voice.
You learn how to be the one people look to when tensions rise because you know how to carry the pressure without cracking.

How Pageantry Helped Me Lead

Pageantry and STEM sound like opposites.
But the skills I sharpened under the spotlight are the same ones I rely on in the field.

Speaking clearly.
Reading the room.
Responding with grace under pressure.
Knowing how to pivot mid-thought and still sound confident.
It’s not just about presentation. It’s about presence.

When I explain a complex system to someone who doesn’t want to hear it
When I mediate a disagreement between coworkers without taking sides
When I’m doubted, interrupted, or dismissed and stay composed anyway
That’s not just professionalism. That’s practice.

And it didn’t come from any engineering textbook.

Soft Is Not the Opposite of Strong

You can be gentle and grounded.
You can be graceful and still get the job done.
You don’t have to be cold to be taken seriously.

There’s strength in staying calm when the tone in the room shifts.
In choosing patience over panic.
In navigating complex people and complex problems with the same confidence.

Soft doesn’t mean silent.
It means strategic.
It means steady.
It means knowing when to speak and when to let your presence speak for itself.

What I Want You to Know

If you’ve ever taken a breath before responding just to make sure you wouldn’t be misunderstood
If you’ve ever replayed a conversation in your head wondering how you could have said it differently
If you’ve ever stayed up late writing the perfect email because you knew you couldn’t afford to sound emotional
If you’ve ever bitten your tongue in meetings where everyone else talked over you
If you’ve ever handled doubt, disrespect, or dismissal and still got the job done anyway

You are not soft.
You are sharp.
You are resilient.
You are leading in a way that cannot be taught, only earned.

And even when it feels invisible, it matters.
Because when you lead with emotional intelligence, the whole team operates better.
Because when you stay composed, people listen more closely.
Because when you bring clarity instead of chaos, people follow.

Soft skills are not secondary.
They are the reason so many women thrive in spaces that weren’t designed for them in the first place.

You don’t need to change how you show up.
You just need to know that the way you lead, quietly, confidently, and with conviction, is enough.

 

See you next week for Week 7: Wearing Both Well
We’ll talk about balance, not perfection, and how I show up in two different worlds without leaving any part of myself behind.

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Madalaina Hlava is the current Miss Land of Lincoln (IL). You can follow her on her title's Instagram.

To read her other guest blogs for Section 36 Forevers, click here.

  

The J.O.Y. Project

By Olivia Jarrell

Confidence isn’t something we’re born with, it’s something we build. It starts by being honest with ourselves: knowing our strengths, our values, and even our fears. When you understand who you are, you stop trying to fit into molds that don’t suit you. That self-awareness becomes a quiet, steady foundation. Real confidence doesn’t need to be loud; it just needs to be real.

One of the biggest obstacles to confidence is the inner critic, the voice that questions your worth or abilities. That voice might always be there, but it doesn’t have to lead. Confidence grows when you take action in spite of fear. Each time you speak up, take a risk, or try something new, you prove to yourself that you’re capable. Even when things don’t go perfectly, the fact that you showed up counts more than you think.

Building confidence also means surrounding yourself with the right people, those who support, challenge, and remind you of what you bring to the table. Prepare when you can, ask for help when you need it, and give yourself credit along the way. Confidence isn’t about perfection or pretending; it’s about showing up as yourself and trusting that’s enough.

The J.O.Y. Project: 

The mission of The J.O.Y. Project is to empower individuals by equipping them with a skill set of self confidence, perseverance and authenticity to navigate life’s academic and personal challenges. 

Through community-building, mentorship, and personal development tools, the project encourages young adults to embrace the journey of growth and rediscover the joy that comes from living true to who they are.

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Olivia Jarrell is the current Miss Greater Columbus (OH). You can find her on her title's Instagram.

This is her first guest blog for Section 36 Forevers.

STEM Buds

By Samantha Williams

When I walked into my very first chemistry class, the first thing I noticed was a photo of 29 scientists sitting together outside the Solvay Conference of 1927. I knew I wanted to be like the only woman in the photo, sitting just one person away from Albert Einstein, as his equal. She was not in the background of the photo, she was not smiling, and she most definitely did not look timid. She looked powerful, educated, and like she wouldn’t let anyone get in the way of her making incredible scientific discoveries. I instantly knew I wanted to be just like Marie Curie.

During my senior year of high school, I had the unique experience of interning as a student teacher for an 11th grade physics class and a 10th grade chemistry class. I absolutely loved my job, teaching students about subjects I was passionate about was so fun to me. But there was one thing I hated. Every time I placed a paper on a student’s desk, they would immediately look at it and say, “This is too hard. I can’t do this.” They wouldn’t even read the problem before giving up. It broke my heart. I hated seeing students discouraged by the stigma that STEM is impossible to understand.

I haven’t always had confidence in my STEM abilities. I remember staring at a chemistry exam in 11th grade, feeling completely lost and on the verge of tears. I had studied for two weeks, but still couldn’t answer the questions. But instead of giving up, I found ways to learn differently, using YouTube videos, making diagrams, and most importantly, asking questions. STEM isn’t meant to be understood by yourself. You won’t understand everything, and that’s okay. There will always be someone else out there who can help, so ask them! Work together to improve both of your understandings. That mindset is what I now teach others through STEM Buds.

I began STEM Buds as a mentorship program to help students develop study skills while enhancing their knowledge and understanding of STEM subjects. STEM Buds is founded on the idea that anyone can succeed in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics. Like flowers, knowledge must be nurtured. With the right environment and care, anyone’s love of STEM can blossom. Through sharing monthly DIY lab demos, STEM careers, and a STEM Hall of Fame on my Instagram and Facebook @miss.sam.williams, I hope to show people that STEM is not scary. My goal is to prove the people who say STEM is “too hard” for them, wrong.

While sharing STEM Buds online has allowed me to reach so many people virtually, I know the real magic happens in classrooms—where students can ask questions, try experiments, and learn together in real time. That’s why I’m currently working on bringing STEM Buds into schools across Connecticut, creating spaces where students feel supported, curious, and confident in their ability to succeed in STEM.

Just like Marie Curie defied expectations and shattered barriers in science, I want every student to know that they belong in the room, not behind the scenes, but at the table, in the photo, making history. And if I can help even one student feel like they deserve to take up that space, then I’ve done what I came here to do.

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Samantha Williams is a STEM advocate studying chemical engineering at the University of Connecticut in the Honors program. She enjoys participating in nanoparticle research, volunteering with campus police, and playing the flute. As a physics student teacher, she noticed that students were intimidated by STEM subjects. Inspired by her desire to help her students develop confidence in understanding STEM subjects, she founded STEM Buds, an organization dedicated to enhancing the next generation’s knowledge and study skills in STEM. This is her first Section 36 Forevers guest blog.

STEM Buds is founded on the idea that anyone can succeed in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics. Like flowers, knowledge must be nurtured. With the right environment and care, anyone’s love of STEM can blossom. STEM Buds, created by Samantha Williams is a mentorship program helping students develop study skills while enhancing their knowledge and understanding of STEM subjects. 

Getting to Know Me

By Kalli Gregory

Hi! My name is Kalli Gregory and I am Miss Marion Popcorn Festival! I have had the privilege over the past ten months to travel the state of Ohio representing the WORLD'S LARGEST Popcorn festival! Marion is the Popcorn Capital of the world and is the only city to be home to a President (Warren G. Harding, 29th U.S. President) and a Miss America (Marylin Meseke, Miss America 1938). I am so blessed to represent such an incredible part of American history! 

This incredible title has led me back to the Miss Ohio Stage to highlight the incredible city that Marion is, while also advocating for a cause that is my mission in life. 

When I was in the sixth grade I made a promise to my brother, Trent, to teach the world what it really means to have cerebral palsy. This led to a statewide initiative called Trent's Triumph, that has changed the perspectives of over 75,000 people, I have had the privilege of Partnering with national organizations, raising thousands of dollars to help further research, and I have launched a free children’s activity to help teach those with cerebral palsy. My work with Trent's Triumph seeks to educate, amplify, and provide for those living with cerebral palsy all in honor of the incredible life of my brother Trent. 

I am currently a Senior Studying Neuroscience and Psychology at Bowling Green State University! This path was chosen because of my experience of having a brother with cerebral palsy. I know what those with Cerebral Palsy are capable of and I want to help other reach their fullest potential. Those with Cerebral Palsy are just like us, they just move differently! 

In my spare time I love to travel, Volunteer and create art! I even own my own art business called, Kalli's Creative Corner! 

I also love to dance! I've trained in nine different styles of dance with tap and contemporary being my favorite!

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Kalli Gregory is the current Miss Marion Popcorn Festival (OH). You can follow her on her Instagram.

This is her first guest blog for Section 36 Forevers.

Miss South Dakota Week 2025: A Rookie’s Recap

By Rylin Yerdon

Last month, I competed for the coveted title of Miss South Dakota for the first time ever. To say it was a life changing experience would be an understatement. Here’s how it went:

The Miss delegates arrived to Brookings on Sunday, May 25th. I kicked off my arrival by locking my keys in my car— oops! Despite this unforeseen mishap, I was still on time for our kickoff meeting, where our executive director, Carol, gave us a formal welcome. A phrase she emphasized before rehearsals began was “empowered women empower women”. This would become our motto throughout the week. The theme of the show was “Imagine the Possibilities”, which was inspired by the journey of Joelle Simpson, Miss South Dakota 2024.

Afterwards, we got straight to work recording introduction videos for the Miss delegates. In our down time, we were able to complete our social media activations (which you can check out on my Instagram, @missmccrorygardenssd). Because I went to school for digital and social media marketing, I greatly enjoyed making content with my sister queens and hyping up our followers for the Miss South Dakota competition. Later in the evening, we learned our opening and fitness numbers. As someone who loves to dance but cannot remember choreography to save my life, this was both a fun and humbling experience for me. Our outstanding choreographer and forever Miss South Dakota 2021, Kaitlin, was a fantastic role model and hype woman throughout the rehearsal process. As a professional dancer working in New York, she had the ability to instill a belief in all of us that no matter how much we struggled, the point was to have fun and enjoy the opportunity to perform.

The second day of Miss South Dakota week consisted of cleaning the choreography we learned the night before as well as learning new choreography to the iconic Chapel Roan song, Pink Pony Club. It was nice to dress in a fun costume and have a good time dancing with my sister queens— my inner show-choir kid finally got to step out of retirement! To break up dance rehearsal hours, we took a break to clean up the Dakota Nature Park in Brookings to honor Joelle’s community service initiative, Nurturing Nature. We also took some time to learn about the history of the park, as our executive director attended South Dakota State University in the past and witnessed the park evolve over time. Because I am a recent graduate of South Dakota State, I found this very interesting as I have fond memories throughout my college years involving the Dakota Nature Park. For dinner that evening, September, a Brookings Host Committee member, hosted a barbecue at her residence and decided to treat us titleholders. After a long day of dancing and walking practice, a barbecue was just what we needed to unwind for the evening and rest for the next day.

On Tuesday, we were finally able to begin rehearsing in the Oscar Larson Performing Arts Center on the SDSU campus. Construction of the set had begun the Saturday prior and culminated late Monday night. We practiced our dances and guest performances as well as our walking and loading patterns for the competition. There was lots of anticipation in the air that day because we were getting a special treat for dinner: baked potatoes at the Brookings VFW (Veterans of Foreign Wars). Since this was my first year competing, I wasn’t familiar with this tradition, but I knew it was an opportunity to connect with volunteers and supporters of the Miss South Dakota Organization, and for that I was excited. After hours of locked-in rehearsal, we were dismissed to freshen up and make our way to the VFW. My carpool group arrived slightly early, so we took the opportunity to chat with some of the VFW volunteers and take some fun pictures with the Miss South Dakota Organization photographer, Bob (or “Bobarazzi”, as we call him). The meal itself began with a prayer over the titleholders, and then we were dismissed to help ourselves to a baked potato and homemade dessert. Probably the best baked potato and cherry-topped cheesecake I’ve ever had! We rounded out the meal by singing “God Bless America” with the VFW volunteers. I was so grateful to be surrounded by faith-oriented individuals who had a passion for celebrating our nation and honoring those who risk their lives to keep America safe and free.

Bob Grandpre

Wednesday was a big day. Our Teen titleholders arrived to Brookings and the Miss Sigma group— my group— had private interview. In the spirit of transparency, private interview has always made me extremely nervous. My knees shake, my mouth goes dry, and my heart races making me sound out of breath. I paced outside the interview doors, going through my introduction and practicing answers to mock interview questions I conjured up in my head. This only made my anxiety worse. In the midst of my panic, I remembered something: it is impossible for anxiety and gratefulness to exist at the same time. There I was panicking over an interview for the job of a lifetime, and I was letting anxiety steal my gratitude. I had worked so hard for this opportunity, and I wanted to be able to genuinely enjoy it. I bowed my head and whispered a prayer to myself. Just as I concluded, the interview doors opened, and it was go time. For the first time, I truly felt peace knowing that God was beside me in my interview.

Bob Grandpre

Thursday was another big day. The Sigma group had on-stage question, fitness, and evening gown. Out of all the areas of competition, fitness is my favorite. During my adolescence, I greatly struggled with my body image and fell victim to insecurity and extremely unhealthy habits. Two years later, I came back stronger, healthier, and confident in my own skin. Fitness is how I celebrate my recovery from that low point in my life and the feeling of freedom that comes with it. I felt amazing while proudly modeling my red Rebel Athletic set and owning my moment onstage. Evening gown is my second favorite area of competition, mostly because of the history behind the dress I wore. I got it secondhand from a relative of mine who served as Miss South Dakota’s Outstanding Teen a few years ago. Before she had that dress, another relative of ours who used to compete tried on the dress when she was shopping for a Miss South Dakota evening gown. With royal blue rhinestones on top of the bright flashy blue fabric, it’s the gown that keeps on giving!

Bob Grandpre

Friday’s competition was much more laid back for me. All I had left was the talent portion of competition, which had me both excited and insanely nervous. My talent is singing, which I have been doing since I was a little girl. I chose to sing “Tightrope” from the major motion picture The Greatest Showman at Miss South Dakota. There’s a line in the song that says, “some people won’t sail the sea ‘cause they’re safer on land”, which describes my decision to take on the world of pageantry. Growth does not stem from staying in the same place. We must branch out and intentionally place ourselves in front of things that scare us in order to overcome our fear. And in those moments before I took the stage, I was feeling that fear. Then I remembered: anxiety and gratefulness cannot coexist. I had the opportunity to sing on the Miss South Dakota stage. I worked so hard to be in that moment, patiently waiting in the wings for my turn to share my gift of singing. My name was announced, the lights came up, the music started, and I sang Tightrope as if I was Charity Barnum.

Bob Grandpre

Saturday was finals and crowning for the Miss contestants. Although I did not make the top ten, I was ecstatic to watch my sister queens compete in finals and shine their light in their own unique ways. Out of everything that happened throughout the week, the sweetest moment was watching Jamee Kattner become Miss South Dakota 2025. Jamee’s dedication to excellence, her kind and nurturing demeanor, and ability to uplift others through her gift of song makes her an incredible representative of the great state of South Dakota. She is an inspiration to all of us titleholders and will undoubtedly do incredible things within the year ahead of her— make sure to follow her journey @missamericasd!

Bob Grandpre

As I sit back and reflect on Miss South Dakota Week 2025, I have so much to be thankful for. I gained 19 new friendships, achieved my goal of performing on the Miss South Dakota stage, and got to share my passion of advocating for women’s success. After thinking long and hard about what my future will look like, I’ve decided that pageantry will have a place within it. My journey is not over, but rather just beginning. As local competition season commences in South Dakota, I will hopefully have this opportunity again. Until then, I am Rylin Yerdon, your Miss McCrory Gardens 2025.

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Cameron Schroder

Rylin Yerdon is the current Miss McCrory Gardens (SD). You can find her on her title's Instagram.

Be sure to read all of her other Section 36 Forevers guest blogs as well.