For the women who are done being underestimated in spaces they worked hard to earn.
“Wait, so you’re in STEM and you compete in pageants?”
I’ve gotten that question more times than I can count. Usually said with surprise, sometimes with judgment, and always as if those two things couldn’t possibly coexist in one person.
But yes. I am.
I love working in tech. I also love the color pink and a good hair and makeup day.
I’m the girl who walks onto a jobsite and into interviews with pride of all the hard work I have accomplished.
Not because I’m confused, but because I’ve chosen to live a full life, not a compartmentalized one.
And if that makes people uncomfortable, so be it.
The Time I Had to Prove I Belonged—Again
In one of my project management classes, I was named team lead. I took the role seriously, communicated and reminded deadlines, organized project streamline, and tried to make sure everyone had a voice.
And yet, nearly every suggestion I made was met with resistance or my ideas someone else tried to take credit for and claim as their own. It felt like my team was waiting for me to fail and taking credit when I succeed. They questioned my decisions, second-guessed every call I made, and when it came time to actually do the work? They disappeared.
I carried the project. I built it from the ground up, start to finish. But when a technical issue came up during submission, suddenly everyone found their voice again, this time to point fingers.
They immediately threw me under the bus. No one asked how they could help. No one owned their part. They questioned whether I even did the work… after doing none of it themselves.
That was a turning point for me, not because I broke down, but because I didn’t.
I knew what I had contributed. I knew what I brought to the table.
And I realized that I never needed their validation to prove I belonged.
Why I Started This Blog
That experience, and many others like it, are why I started this series.
Because it’s not just about wearing a crown or being in a male-dominated industry.
It’s about the unspoken rules women are expected to follow to be taken seriously.
Don’t be too loud.
Don’t be too confident.
Don’t be too feminine.
This blog is for the women who are tired of those rules.
The ones who’ve been overlooked, questioned, talked over, but still showed up, still led, still built something amazing.
It’s for the woman who wears safety goggles and mascara.
For the girl who leads group projects and still gets asked if she even knows what she’s doing.
It’s for those of us who are constantly told to pick a side, when the truth is, we already are whole.
What’s Coming Next
Over the next 8 weeks, I’ll be sharing stories and reflections on:
- The stereotypes I’ve faced in both STEM and pageantry
- How presence, poise, and leadership cross every industry line
- Why embracing your identity is not weakness, it’s revolutionary
- And how I built EmpowHER in STEM to help girls feel seen, supported, and powerful
Because I’ve learned that the more you lean into who you really are, the less you need to explain yourself.
So if you’ve ever been underestimated, dismissed, or expected to shrink—
This space is for you.
You’re not too much. You’re exactly enough.
And you never had to pick between being powerful and being you.
Welcome to the best of both worlds.
See you next week for Week 2: Safety Goggles & Stage Lights 
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