21 things I learned by 21

By Arianna Shanks-Hill

In the month of December I celebrated my 21st birthday. The night before, I sat down with my journal and I wrote about all the things I was grateful for: all the things that made the first 21 years of my life remarkable. Then, I thought about all of the not so great things I experienced that taught me some extremely valuable lessons. I decided to write some of those down as well, because there are no amazing highs without the accompanying lows (which arguably stand to teach us the most about ourselves). As I sat and wrote these lessons down it occurred to me that some of them would have been very helpful to have at an earlier time in my life, and most of them I'm still working on mastering. So, whether you find something you needed to hear or are reminded of an important lesson you learned in your own life, here it is:

21 things I learned by 21…

1. Other people’s opinions of you are none of your business

2. You are destroying your own peace by responding to everything. Not everything deserves your time or attention

3. It is always better to try and fail than not try at all. 

4. There is no such thing as “the right time” there is only time and what you choose to do with it

5. You are entirely up to you. No one else's actions will ever define you

6. Someone else’s qualifications do not take away from yours. Have faith in what makes you, you

7. There is always room for more people at the table. Don’t be afraid to support and uplift others on your way to achieving your goals

8. Embarrassment is subjective; its only embarrassing if you let it be

9. The only person who is coming to save you is yourself

10. If outside validation is your only form of nourishment then you will be hungry for the rest of your life. Fill your own cup

11. Do not let the things that have happened to you turn you into a person you are not

12. The universe will keep sending you the same lesson until you learn it; whatever you are not changing you are choosing

13. Whatever it is, do it scared. The time will pass anyway

14. It is literally impossible to miss out on what is meant for you

15. the way people treat you says more about them than it does about you; forgiveness says more about you than it does about them

16. If you are only focusing on what you don't have, you will never be satisfied. Be grateful and count your blessings and your blessings will never run out

17. Suffering does not make you brave

18. To love and be loved is rest

19. Some people will love you no matter what you do, and some people will never love you no matter what you do. Go where the love is

20. Do not borrow grief from the future. Let today be today and tomorrow be tomorrow

21. Love comes from so many places other than just romantic relationships. There is never a replacement for true, genuine friendship

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Arianna Shanks-Hill is the current Miss Tippecanoe (Indiana). You can find her on her title's Instagram and/or her personal Instagram. She is also frequent and valued contributor to Section 36 Forevers. 

To learn more about Arianna, feel free to check out her Interview with Section 36.